Translating You and Me to Us

Of late, I have been blogging more about relationships arising from my Love Dare challenges which have triggered more internal reflecting than I bargained for.

Looking back, it's interesting how these thoughts started from a chance conversation leading to the subsequent video we watched and re-visited once again today during bible study:

The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman', for she was taken out of man." For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
- Genesis 2: 23 - 24 (New International Version)

Ed and I have been discussing how difficult it is to live our lives as an "US" versus "You and Me". Even as we acknowledge that marriage is about becoming ONE, this one-ness doesn't take place immediately and consensus isn't achieved overnight. Many times, we go back to our individualistic nature and expect our own way. Hence, the disagreements and differing views that we sometimes struggle to resolve.

Thinking as ONE can be reflected in numerous ways:

• Making a decision that is best for us versus what works for me.
• Thinking through the implications of my decision, what I say as if it was directed at me.
• Feeling his emotions be it happiness, angst, tiredness almost asif I was going through the same circumstances.
• Loving and honouring his parents asif they were mine.

Adding a Mrs to my name doesn't change the way I think. For better or for worse, each of us brings along certain expectations (sometimes wrong or unreasonable) to the marriage, taking a leaf from our parents' own marriages or what we observe around us. This can get really daunting and there is much to un-do and change. *sigh*

Although this change will take time, recognizing the need to be more "US-minded" is a start as we enter this next stage of our marriage.

And so our journey continues...